StepDad Rant & Photoshoots.

Spent the day photoshooting Alana And Charlotte, pictures turned out well, to see them go to:

http://zappalove.deviantart.com/gallery/#Photoshoots

It was a long few hours, took alot of makeup, hair and clothing efforts to get the right effect, it took alot of effort to edit them and it took a hell of a lot of willpower to keep going into stupid o'clock uploading them to facebook and deviantart, and every other god dam site.

I was going to go to bed, and i remembed something my jerkoff of a stepdad said about me a while back, there was a film on that was an 18+ and my stepdad being the fucking arsehole that he is, decided it was a bandwagon he could jump onto, so instantly started saying i shouldnt watch it, i should leave, or we shouldnt have it on, and he said it was ''lapsed parenting'' or something, basicaly saying my mum was a bad parent, well at least she listens to me, at least she is more open minded than he is, at least she isnt an overbearing, unfunny, pushy, aroggant ARSEHOLE.

He then went onto say....

''She shouldnt watch this because she is impressionable because she goes to councelling.''

WHAT
THE
FUCK


Because i go to councelling? That makes me impressionable? So whatever the contents of this film are, im going to copy them. Because i go to councelling. Im not aloud to do things, because i go to councelling?

YOU FUCKING RETARD. JUST PISS THE FUCK OFF.

DONT EVEN GIVE ME THAT SHIT!

He is so wrong. So fucking wrong, this is what i mean when i said he doesnt have an open mind, he thinks that anyone who goes to therapy sessions, is weak in the head and easily influenced. If that was true, id have killed people and put them into meat pies by now.

I MEAN COME ON.

What the fuck is that about.

For the love of god, worst logic ever. He talks about me all the time, Never anything good.

I think im starting to hate him.

I wont tell my mum that i hate the man she loves.
But i think i do.

His jokes arent funny, if someone has a says the word 'confused' he will say, 'confused.com?' and laugh at his own joke, as if it even remotly funny, and he will look around for people who are forcing smiles though the fits of anger at this sad man shit jokes.

Just today, he was saying how i wasnt ''domesticated'' enough. How he feels sorry for the man i have to live with, how im a pig and should be ashamed of hte way i live.

HELLO
GO TO MOST TEENAGERS ROOMS AND THEY WILL BE THE SAME

What the fuck

Because unlike my teenage years were not in the 1960's, Grandad. Teenagers care less and less about your fucking stupid rules. He isnt neat and tidy, the house is only tidy cuz my mum cleans it, he doesnt help around the house - granted neither do i, i used to ask my mum all the time if she wanted stuff doing, but she never did so i eventually stopped asking - like once, my mum was saying, would it kill you to help abit after work, and he said, he was working all day, he shouldnt come hoem to have to work more.

HELLO, MY MUM WORKS, THEN COOKS, THEN CLEANS. but thats what women are for right?

Well welcome to the 21st century, where things arent given to you on a silver tray by a woman you boss around, you sexist bastard.

I hate him. I really do.

He gets so childish over totally normal things.

Whenever we go out for dinner somewhere, he usually talks and i listen to my ipod (<3>
We were at a resteraunt once, and cuz i ended up talking most of the time, he went in a mard and just sulked about. My mum just told him to stop being silly, cuz he was.

But then stupid things happen.

Stupid things, that were NOT my fault, but somehow i ended up taking abit of the blame, and even having to apologise for it, they said they didnt hear it to try make me do it again, but i just said that id said it. Which i had.

We were sat around and i was talking for like i dunno 10 minutes at a time, with random gaps where my stepdad would talk, then he said something and my mum said 'thats not true' and i knew she was right, so i said, 'Yeah no, thats not true' and he denied it again and i just said 'no its not true' and pointed at him abit, cuz it was something to do with him, it was like 'thats not true because you...'

How did he respond.

He cut me off mid sentance, to tell me to shut up, im a child, i dont know what im talking about,shut up this isn't anything to do with me, shut up, its not my place to talk, shut up, get lost, your stupid so shut up. This is pretty much what got loudly said to me, in a resteraunt.
I was trying to get a word in to say, ''No i wont shut up, im part of this table, part of this family, im entitled to speak if i want to, and all i was doing was agreeing with my mum'' But no, couldnt say anything, my mum told us to stop it, and i just ran off and i heard him saying ''i dont like her talking to me like that'' ''she needs to learn to be polite'' or something like that i ran off to the toilets, where i got very agressive with the stuff they had there. The toilet got a kicking and the walls got a beating. No damage unfortunatly, could have, didnt. Should have though.
My mum followed me after to ask if was alright and i was saying, what was that about! She just said he got worked up and took it out on me but i DID provoke him.

I'm sorry... rewind a second.

I provoked him, defending HER argument.

Oh Great Logic There. NOT.

Today like i said before, he was saying he feels sorry for who ever has to live with me, Oh great, tell me how FUCKING USLESS I AM, THEN. GO ON. TELL ME HOW SO FUCKING HORRIBLE I AM TO LIVE WITH, TELL THE WHOLE FUCKIGN WORLD, LET EVERYONE KNOW WHAT A FUCKING BRAT I AM. TELL EVERYONE. SEE IF I CARE WHAT YOU DO, BECAUSE WHATEVER YOU DO, YOU FUCK UP MY LIFE. SO FINE, TELL ME IM A FUCKING USELESS WASTE OF SPACE, CONFIRM WHAT I ALREADY KNOW YOU LOWLIFE PEICE OF CRAP.

I dont feel sorry for whoever lives with me.

I feel sorry for me. Having to live with YOU.

This is also the man who tells me i should go to church more, this from the man who only went cuz he fancied a girl who goes there. I hate the fucking shit he produces.

''nothing like a christian upbringing''

there is nothing to say to that except how much i hate him and i hope he trips over the door mat going into the door, and while he is at it, he can also smash his face against the wooden floors.

His god wont look so friendly when his face is smashed up.

Ill just laugh and tell him that god is testing him or something

Bloody Hell.

I hate the idea of godfearing people, if you have to live your whole life being to terrified that you wont get into heaven, to do anything at all. Then frankly your wasting your life. Can you imagine the faces of those sorts of people, if their soul discovers that there is no heaven or something crazy. (:

I hate my life sometimes.